Sylvia Plath, Dr Hook and the Dapto Dogs


Social media rightly gets a spanking, but occasionally it’s brilliant. 3pm on the last day of the working week can be, well, challenging, and I was searching for essays on a database, randomly selecting pieces without knowing what was in them.

I opened a file and it was dedicated solely to Sylvia Plath, the confessional American poet. Clever and moving, sure, but not the sunny stuff you want to set up your weekend. She’s a little grim and intense. She was never considered for a zany role in any of The Police Academy films.

An anti-Dr Hook, if you like.

So, I checked into (Facebook and in real life) the Broadway pub at 4.27, including this, to elevate the atmosphere-

“If you lose all hope, you can always find it again.”

Richard Ford, The Sportswriter


Here’s the conversation I had online. It made me laugh!

Nicole: Definitely not Sylvia Plath.

Mickey:  No-one deserves Sylvia Plath on a Friday afternoon, Nicole.

Greg:  the thing is, she probably would have hated having to go there, but once there    would have had a great time…a bit like Tuesday night training when you’re in the B grade…

Greg: Sylvia I mean, not Nicole.


Mickey: Sylvia and I went to the pub one Thursday night, Greg. We each had a beef schnitzel (she had Diane sauce, I had the pepper gravy) and then a man wearing an oddly-elongated beanie played Vance Joy covers on an acoustic guitar. Our night was concluded by jagging the trifecta on race nine of the Dapto dogs (each greyhound sporting an alliterative name, of course). But this splendid evening of twinkling human excitement left her morose and sullen. I never saw her again.

Nicole: Quite right Greg. Nicole would have been very happy to go there, especially on a Friday afternoon!

Greg: I tried to take her out myself once (Sylvia, not Nicole), but Sylvia’s mother said Sylvia’s too busy to come to the phone. Then the operator said, forty cents more, for the next three minutes…

Greg:  I was bloody depressed after that. She’s knows how to do it to ya. (Sylvia, not Nicole)

Mickey:  If only Sylvia had spent time with Dr Hook’s extensive and sunny back catalogue her poetry, and life might’ve turned out differently.

Greg: It’s no coincidence that anyone that spends plenty of time around Dr Hook’s back catalogue (definitely not a euphemism) turns out differently.

Mickey: Happily correct. They also sing about beauty and they sing about truth.

Greg: Just when I’d thought I’d loved this post all I could, I just loved it a little bit more.


Thanks to Nicole and Greg for making me laugh, many times!

Dr Hook



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